this baby is supposed to weigh around 3.1 pounds. i'd say he weighs more like 10.1 pounds. and his foot is a solid man's 14.
how do i know? because he kicks my bladder with it all.the.time. like, so much so that it's starting to go from "uncomfortable" to "in pain". it literally feels like he's going "heel to toe" on my poor bladder. there was this girl that went to high school with me that bounced when she walked. like, think heel/toe/bounce, heel/toe/bounce over and over and over again.
i assume that's what max is gonna walk like.
my shirts don't cover my stomach at this point. it's like laura said, "why don't they remember they are MATERNITY clothes!?" amen, laura.
dear liz lange, make this tent go to my feet.
i'm always hungry. always thirsty. always mad.
i will chew anyone out at any point in time. just look at me wrong, and you too will be on the crap list. pratt flipped when we left the park today. pinched my face and wouldn't stop crying.
ask him how that went over. i swear he would say, "turd in punchbowl". because that's literally how it went over. we went to walmart shortly thereafter and not only was he denied ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING HE WANTED (including some new yogurt and even dutch chocolate milk), he was also insistent on going to clint's office and telling him about his "bad behavior" so he could get it over with. i told him he was going to need to tell his daddy when he got home from work.
pratt's exact words were, "can i go now so i not have to wait all that time?"
and yes. this school psychologist is using the term "bad behavior". i'm not putting a spin on it. i'm not sugar coating this crap. it was bad. not "negative" or "undesirable". it was "bad". like a bank robbers. or a criminals. B.A.D. that's the kind of mood i'm in. poor clint.
i guess that's it. if i keep typing, i'm gonna start cussing. kidding...sort of.
happy (or in my case, grumpy) thursday!
5 comments:
Oh, there it is! And it's one of the most adorable pregnant bellies I've ever seen!
Please go back and read my "35 weeks and venting" post. It was sometime in December 08. You will enjoy it right about now. I'm pretty sure I said something about spanking my unborn child. And they still let me leave the hospital with him!??
cute. cute. cute.
i'm serious. i may have bump envy.
You crack me up.
Firstly: you're adorable, and, yes, very very funny.
Secondly: I'm so with you
So, tonight, in Target - Abs was pulling this "I'm gonna scream at the top of my lungs every 7 seconds just to see what you're gonna do, because I think it's HI-larious!" crap.
Hannah, I tried. I tried ignoring it, I tried distracting her, talking to her, telling her mommy was sad, telling her she was being bad, putting her in time out, covering her mouth, frowning, threatening to leave, threatening to stay, bribing her, ignoring it some more, saying no...you get the idea.
And every few seconds she would smirk, scream, and watch me.
I swear, the fact that Target has security cameras probably saved her life. I may or may not have applied a very small (yet consistent) amount of pressure to a certain pressure point on my child's neck. Enough to make her say "Oh" ...Yeah, so ok, NOT my proudest moment. I'm not endorsing it.
She cried. For about 30 seconds, and then she was the best behaved child ever for the rest of the trip.
So. Just sayin'. I hear you. This is hard, but you're doing great. At least you're not resorting to pressure points.
Oh, and that was Laura obviously...forgot I was signed in another account.
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