update.

the doctor's appointment went well. the ultrasound tech saw the same thing as last time. an empty gestational sac. she told me that she figured he would want me scheduled for a d&c, but she wasn't certain. that he could tell me more about what he thought would be best.

we met with dr. s and he basically told me what i assumed from google. that it was a blighted ovum. this is basically when a fertilized egg attaches itself to the uterine wall, but the embryo doesn't develop. cells develop to form the gestational sac, but not the embryo itself. so. he went on to say that if i could find any comfort at all in this situation, to try to find it in that there was actually no miscarriage of a baby. or an embryo.

it's bizarre because the hcg levels will continue to rise and the woman's body continues to act pregnant. my body hasn't fully miscarried yet. meaning, i haven't completely released everything. not to be too graphic for the male population...but basically i have three options.

one. wait on my body to figure out there is no baby, and for everything to happen on it's own.

two. take medicine to help my body start the process.

three. schedule a d&c.

i asked what he would recommend. and he laughed and said that he's always asked that. he said that he would tell his wife to wait. just wait on it to do it on it's own.

but, he went on to say that emotionally it's hard to wait. because your body feels pregnant. and you want there to be some closure of the situation. he also said that after a while, the body can become infected by everything.

he wasn't a big fan of the medicine. he said that it causes severe cramping and such heavy bleeding that a large percent of the population end up in the ER due to fears that something has gone wrong.

he thought maybe we could wait a week. see what happens. but go ahead and schedule the d&c for next week. friday morning. early, early. so that's what we did. he wants it to pass on it's own, but just in case it doesn't, we do have some end in sight.

i don't know if it was because clint was with me, or if it was because the news was better than i expected, but i felt so relieved walking out of that office. i felt this huge weight lifted off my shoulders.

i know so much has to do with all the prayers you guys have been praying. i honestly have so many people to write and thank. it may take me months. really, thank you thank you thank you.

i don't know what i ever did to deserve such wonderful friends. no, that's wrong. i did nothing to deserve you all. but for some reason, you love me anyway. so thank you.

thank you for the messages, emails, texts, calls. all of it. i'm such a lucky girl.