let me preface this by saying that we have had such an easy five years. sooooooo easy. we've never experienced death. or infidelity. or anything that really shakes you to your core.
but we've had two children. and i've had mad, crazy post partum. and i think that i struggle with depression more than the average joe. maybe not. but i know i make a conscious effort to be happy most days. and my life is so easy. so i don't think that it should have to be a conscious thing. like i should just feel it. anyway.
there have been valleys. for sure.
but i've never wondered if he loves me after a breakdown. i've never worried he would walk out. or move on. or change. i never question his feelings for me. i know that he thinks i'm better today than i was five years ago. or even 8 years ago.
as we were driving back and talking, i realized that i will do whatever it takes to make him happy. and make his life easy. because he deserves that. he spends so much of his time making my life easy.
the seed was planted on the ride back.
it has continued to grow...and become more obvious as we settled in. as we unpacked. as we got back to our normal routine. i always have a really hard time when vacations are over. maybe because it's back to the everyday grind. maybe now it's because i'm away from my family. my parents and my sister. and so i feel lonely.
but monday came easy. and for that, i'm so thankful.
so clint, if you're reading this, thank you. thank you for this fairy tale of a life.
thank you for loving Jesus. and me. and these little boys.
i can't put into words just how happy i am to spend the rest of my life with you.
i see lots of front porch rockin'. lots of guitar pickin'. and wine drinkin'.
and most of all, lots and lots of smoochin'.
xoxo.
han.
1 comment:
I love this post hannah, makes me smile and cry and warms my heart :) I feel Exactly the same way about my Paul :)
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